reflections

Posted on January 31, 2012 by Stefanie Leontiadis

 

Reflecting….. It is said that too much thought is often harmful.  On the other hand, ‘I think, therefore I am’.  Those who will always remain on the surface of things, will only scratch the essence of life, won’t they?  Or simply remain happier in their oblivion..

The ‘thinking zone‘ of developmental and evolutionary creativity, is one to happily fall into.  It leads to drawing or painting a colorful picture, so I am most thankful for my life’s early-bloom, over-beaten thinkings….. The mind will blank out in the sense of perceptually scattered dimensions , and the minutes will fly by as quickly as the speed of light.  More than often, during that chunk of time I would have only worked on small bits of fragmented  imagery (in the case of a carefully crafted chunk…), and then will come the glance at a clock in utter surprise, instinctively wondering where the time had gone, and why.  At moments like this, the world becomes one crystallized mass of energetic lights, and one may realize that ‘time’ becomes drowned into the drawing through rainbows of colors and figurative compositions of shades…  in a multi-dimensional view of an illusionary and not visible at all pitch black mysterious background..  The sound of it may seem strange but the feeling is beautiful.

More than often, it is good to loose patience with logic, systematic pre-tested approaches, rationality and conscious awareness.  It’s not the feeling of being crazy… But just lacking the common sense of things.

When it becomes hard to communicate existing thoughts through language, artful semantics come into place, and save a life’s chaotic state of existence.

If lucky and successful, a negative feeling may be filtered and purified.  A happy one may be shared for eternity.

If all this sounds nonsense…. excuse me, and  “Forgive me my nonsense, as I also forgive the nonsense of those that think they talk sense.” (Robert Frost)

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feline runs

Posted on January 23, 2012 by Stefanie Leontiadis

 

And here we go once more .. entrapped in the cluttered wavelengths of departures and arrivals of unstable human existence that remains, in my eyes, in such a quizzical state – either due to momentary excursions, or more randomly, due to a sad permanence of obligatory displacement or self-seeking wonder.

My condition, hybridized by the latter two, chases me as long as I can remember, in the figurative form of a feline run, in which I take the form of a feline observer looking from the state of a synthetic background condition harmonized by the main theme – ready to fully participate, or withholding myself with patience, but ever yet ready to fire.

The feelings, colored with tones of frozen blues and tints of alizarin-crimson reds, envious and admiring of the warmth of the opposing and contrasting sun-setting oranges and cobalt yellows, alternate, speed up, land, and repeat themselves in undefined patterns.  They show up on and on and on again.  The observer concentrates on undefined targets that are misplaced off of the canvas of visual framing.  The external stimuli, too many to grasp, too deep to comprehend – too hostile to embrace.

Even the sky is inconsistent.  Appearing with unrealistic shades and perceptual inquisitions, the sky forms a new kind of astronomical exposure where colors, many a times, continue the exposure of the background feline figures in space, almost trapping their inner most personal states to the eyes of the newly depicted visual perspective of the universe.

However introvert the figures would wish to appear beneath their Pirandello masks, their emotions are stripped to those who hold the ability to appreciate the diversity and mysticism of the figuratively glittering, gloomy and prolific sky.

 

besides …..   “Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.  Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth”.    (Oscar Wilde)


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urban perception

Posted on December 2, 2011 by Stefanie Leontiadis

One mind fancied the other, and as they were walking side by side, they knew that what they were seeing was common inside of their cognitive vision – not because they had discussed about it, but because their inner most knowledge shared a common denominator of pre-existent reasoning.

The perception of seeing was the perception of each other’s inner volitions, and one could almost paint the other’s spiritual quintessence in a way that no trained painter could outline the portrait of a stranger’s face.

The city, mystified into the semiotics of every building’s corner, and every leaf’s biological pore, became the background of a profound cerebral perceptual moment that dealt with the configuration of each individual’s mind.

Architecture and nature blended into a monochrome vision, and what was evident was only the void of an orienting path, guiding the individuals through the labyrinthine environment of the made city, like the penetration of cold currents in the superficial warmth of a sun-struck sea.

Suddenly, the public open urban space became utterly personal to one’s self, or better yet, personal between the momentary inner conversation of the wanderer and his very own existence.

The surroundings were his own identity of being there, and what could possible feel strange at first became the mirror image of his interpretation, once in an effort to think for a moment of what lied in front of him.

Thought became like the brush of a life-skilled painter, constantly struggling to find interpretational meanings to what lies in the sea in front.  With the lack of his ever-stipulating thought, the brush would have only drowned in the depths of the surroundings and vanish.  What would remain would be two identical, empty bodies, facing each other, in the blankness of existential oblivion.

 

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portrait making

Posted on October 14, 2011 by Stefanie Leontiadis

I love drawing!  And it takes a lot of learning, along with hours of experimentation and trashing.  It’s not pure luck, it’s more of an addiction!

In fact, up until I was 19 years old, I wasn’t able to draw portraits.  I just couldn’t do it, or never had the patience to try.  And when people found out that I draw, and the first annoying thing that they would ask would be “will you draw me??”  I had to say that the only thing I don’t/can’t draw is human faces.

I started practicing portrait-making during the first or second year of college, primarily experimenting with my track-mates on the bus and during competitions.  I became better and better, and found something magically attractive into trying to portray one’s face on  paper.  It’s not just about facial characteristics – it’s the emotion and mood that captivates me most.

The most fascinating thing is putting all the art work in chronological order, and speculating the progress and changes of mood, from the maker’s point of view. And when I finish my latest work and think of what new illustration means I’ve achieved, it only takes one or two more works to truly appreciate the power of improvised progression and deeper insight, that one only acquires through constant experimentation and personal growth.
The bottom line is that it’s very hard to get anywhere without polishing one’s skills. And it’s a never ending process – yet such a beautiful and nourishing one.

Another reason I enjoy art so much, is because I find a way to thank people I love for being kind to me, or being kind in general.  Some form of emotions during the process must take place, or some deeper understanding of one’s state of heart.  (Which makes me ponder on the possibility that perhaps the reason why I haven’t achieved one single successful picture of my oldest sister is because I’ve never been able to fully figure her out, and her being my sister, makes it a bit embarrassing not to have achieved that point of ‘communication’ quite yet. :/ )

 

These are the latest two portraits of my two friends and training partners in Milan.  I enjoyed making these very much  and I thank them from my heart for their hospitality and inspiration  :)  And for the delicious home-made limoncello from Sicily! :P

    

 

and p.s. …. ‎”Every portrait that is painted with feeling is a portrait of the artist, not of the sitter.”    (Oscar Wilde)

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electrical synapses

Posted on September 29, 2011 by Stefanie Leontiadis

Like a bunch of electrically excited neurons trying to signal and transmit information in a bundle of labyrinth thoughts, I write again :)

Research issues? Life issues? Training issues? Injury issues?  Professional guidance issues? Heck, I don’t know.

At the beginning of my doctorate studies in Milan, I had told a dear friend that I didn’t know what I was doing in Milan; what led me to where I was, what kept me there, what inspired me to keep trying.  Maybe all these questions arise repeatedly  because many days (and weeks) feel quite unstable, hectic, confusing, insightfully disoriented, astray, commatose at times…

It mustn’t be the true definition of PhD that causes this (Permanent head Damage), as the neurological conditions of one’s self are not so much able to affect one’s heart.

My friend kindly reminded me with ease; “you are in Milan to fulfill your dreams”.

And as confused as I am about life and true likes and passions, in the sense that I love my research, architecture, art and training, I find myself despising overused expressions of “Jack of all trades, master of none” … (yuck), which could possibly be the outcome of this life’s scenario – although my strong reaction to it has done quite the opposite so far (with a mountain’s height range for improvement – which is the problem) … I sometimes feel like my research is more of a ticket to other paths that I am passionate about, rather than the absolute destination that I am seeking …

(was that a run-on sentence or what…. )

Anyway, let me take it from the top: “as confused as I am about life…”

… I seem to be holding on quite well so far.

So maybe we should all be confused.  And tortured.  And in the middle of an economical crisis (this goes for Greece and all Greeks) …

… Instability is a good thing . It promotes personal evolution.

As long as one truly desires success, of course.

Resolved ?

Only time will tell  ..

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